Mechitza shake-up in United Synagogue
Modernises in the United Synagogue have won a significant victory after an emergency meeting. The United Synagogue has decided to create a second mechitza in its synagogues. This is designed to make three sections from where congregants will participate in services. As Jonathan Sex, Chief Rabbi, explained, ‘we need to embrace the realities of living in the 21st century’. He described the moved as a result of the ‘confusions of living in an increasingly diverse world’. He also stressed that it was important that there was a place for every type of Jew and that the new mechitza would silence critics who accuse the United Synagogue of 19th century thinking.
Rabbi Yitzhak Schochet, a major modernising influence in the United Synagogue has long commented that ‘it is clearly inappropriate that girly men are sitting with real men and that likewise, manly women, sometimes moustachioed are permitted with the women’. He has identified ‘problem congregants’ who have been seen wearing pink kippot or indulging ‘suspicious’ shabbat shalom hugs. He also reported having a regularly attending ponytailed man in his direct eyeline. Other congregants have also raised fears that god will not listen to their prayers when then sit next to women with jobs some of whom are known to wear trousers during the week. This, however, was a point not directly dealt with by Rabbi Schochet who maintains that his own ladies underwear is strictly ‘Purim research’.
It is felt that the traditional ‘self-selecting’ mechitza is no longer workable. Instead, a ‘gender scale’ will be introduced. This will operate from +10 for manly men to -10 for womanly females. Those scoring between + and – 4 will be eligible for the new mechitza.
Rabbis will be responsible to rating each congregant. Although the US has decided to allow each rabbi to use his own judgement, some criteria are suggested. A male congregant would for example score highly if he was married with children, had a long beard and a deep voice. For women, it is suggested that they bring a sample of their cooking for the rabbi to taste.
The new section is not actually to be separated by a mechitza. This will not be necessary since it is to be housed in a separate building. Rabbi Sex elaborated saying ‘think of it as a year-round sukkah. I have given special permission for synagogues to use a video link up to relay the service to the huts which should be erected in synagogue car parks’ He was clear that these booths were not designed as a snub to congregants who will be welcome to eat the kiddish leftovers once other congregants have left.
Key to the new set-up is that synagogue members will have every chance to reassert their repective genders. Synagogues will put on special classes for this purpose. The men will watch videos of muscular naked men as role models whilst the women will watch Nigella Lawson cookery programmes. Some shuls also plan to employ Jacqui Kohen to trim down some of the fatter ladies.
